I have had the misfortune of knowing a few women who have been in physically abusive relationships. The first girl I knew was 14 and I was 16, the reality that abuse starts at a young age was depressive, but opened my eyes to watch out for myself. Another person I knew was my mother, what was so eye-opening about her was she blurred the lines as to who does what to whom. She liked to push her boyfriends (she has bipolar disorder) but no matter who was pushing who watching a person get hit or shoved should not happen it was traumatic.
Physical abuse is one of the most widely known and recognized forms of abuse. It is also the form of abuse with the most laws and policies (in the USA). Physical abuse can happen in many ways, not just a person putting their hands on someone, it can also occur when a person throws things. However, hurting or trying to hurt, pushing, grabbing, slapping, kicking, biting, hitting, beating, and choking are all forms of physical abuse. Like other forms of abuse, the problem is this abuse is rarely conducted alone often times it is a mix of economic, emotional, and sexual abuse.
What are the signs of a physical abuser?
Pushes the relationship to move fast.
Rigid on sex roles.
Wants to isolate the partner.
Threatens to use force during arguments.
Emotional abuse (read about here).
Rough “play” during sex (also read about sexual abuse here)
How to protect yourself.
Do keep a bank account that NO ONE knows about.
Practice how to get out of your home safely.
Use a code word with your children, family, friends, and neighbors when you need the police.
Leave money, an extra set of keys, copies of important documents and extra clothes with someone you trust (or in a place you trust) so you can leave quickly.
Determine who/where you would be able to stay with them or lend you some money.
Inform your child (ren) school, daycare, etc., about who has permission to pick up your children. Decide who at work you will inform of your situation. This should include office or building security (provide a picture of your batterer if possible).
Good place to start for help (here)
If information on the internet is mentored try an app (here) and delete from Google purchase history and off of phone.